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One more thing… It’s personal, ya know? Had this one time - lifeguard gig was killin’ me, back all knotted up. Buddy says, “Try erotic-massage.” I’m like, “What?!” But holy crap, it was unreal. Hands slidin’, pressure just right - I felt like Amélie skippin’ stones, “simple pleasures,” ya feel me? Total bliss. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it was epic.

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So, I head to the job site, which is on the outskirts of town near the old railway. You know, the one that’s been abandoned for ages? I’m there, doing my thing, checking for rust on some old pipes. And then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and there’s this dude on a bike, totally wiped out. I rush over, and he’s like, “I’m fine, I’m fine!” But he’s got this huge scratch on his arm. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not fine! You need a band-aid!”

Joel Kanebjörk ends his playing career and joins Storvreta coaching staff