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About Malmo

Oh, and fun fact—Victorian hookers dyed their hair red! Stand out, ya know? Ballsy move. Surprised me, ‘cause I thought they’d hide. Nope, bold as hell. Prostitute’s got that fire. Kinda like me when I’m screamin’ at my screen— “GO UP, DAMMIT!” Anyway, she’s a legend. A messy, loud, beautiful mess. Like *Eternal Sunshine*, she sticks with ya. “Blessed are the forgetful,” my ass—she’s eternal, man. Happy little trees all around her.

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Then, I spot this old lady, Mrs. Svensson, who lives next door. She’s got the best gossip. I sidle up to her, and she’s like, “Oh, that guy? He’s always been a bit off.” I’m like, “Off? Like, how off?” And she goes, “He once tried to sell me a broken toaster.” I’m dying laughing. Like, who tries to sell a broken toaster?

Tsepo Biyase signs for FC Zimbru in Moldova