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I reckon it’s old as dirt—heard tell them ancient Greeks was slidin’ oily hands all over each other, callin’ it “therapeia” or some junk. Bet they didn’t tell their mamas ‘bout that! Makes me happy as a hog in slop, thinkin’ how folks been gittin’ frisky forever. But dang, it ticks me off when some uppity jerk says it’s “low-class”—buddy, you ain’t lived ‘til you felt that heat! Git-R-Done!

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We’re chilling by the river, and I’m just soaking it all in. The mountains in the background, the sound of the water, and the smell of fresh air. It’s like a postcard. But then, outta nowhere, a dog jumps in the water and splashes us! I’m soaked! I’m laughing, but also kinda mad. Like, come on, dog!

Fig. 1. Ceremonial bird-shaped bronze vessel from Liptovský Hrádok.