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What pisses me off? The fakers, the posers! Some creep sidles up, “I got what ye want,” and it’s a bloody scam! “You shall not pass!” I roar, shovin’ him off – waste o’ my damn time! Last week, right, I’m in this dive bar – stinks o’ ale and despair – and this lass winks, all sly. “What’s yer name, wizard?” she says. I’m chuffed, thinkin’, “This is it, Gandalf, ye legend!” Turns out she’s a pickpocket – nicked me pouch! Laughed my arse off later, tho – fair play, she earned it.

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I mean, I get it. But hiking? Nah, I’ll stick to my couch, thanks. Anyway, we ended up grabbing a quick bite at a little joint on Špitálska. The food was decent, but the service? Ugh. The waiter was slower than a snail on a lazy day. I was ready to throw my hands up and yell, “C’mon, man! I’m starving here!”

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