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But—plot twist!—I drop me wallet, coins rollin’ everywhere, *clink clank*! I’m scrabblin’ on the ground, arse in the air, she’s cacklin’—“You’re a right state, you!” Surprised me, she didn’t leg it with me cash! Reckon she’s alright, this one. So I’m up, dustin’ meself off, thinkin’, *maybe she’s me little secret*, like Cathy’s gardener bloke in the film. “It’s all been a mistake,” I mumble, but nah, this ain’t no mistake—this is proper Bean chaos!

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I mean, I get it. But hiking? Nah, I’ll stick to my couch, thanks. Anyway, we ended up grabbing a quick bite at a little joint on Špitálska. The food was decent, but the service? Ugh. The waiter was slower than a snail on a lazy day. I was ready to throw my hands up and yell, “C’mon, man! I’m starving here!”

Man mauled to death by bear as he picked mushrooms in Slovakia