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Oh, and get this – funny bit – her pimp’s this geezer, looks like a bleedin’ walrus, mustache and all! I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’, “This cat’s a right muppet!” Nearly blew the deal laughin’, but I kept it cool, yeah. In me head, I’m like, “Austin, you’re a legend, shaggin’ through time!” Wrapped it up quick, no faff, just fun – “It’s all in the past now,” like the movie says, and I’m off, smilin’.

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But then, out of nowhere, a group of kids started playing soccer nearby. One of them kicked the ball, and it came flying right at us! I ducked, but Jake? He took it right in the gut. I couldn’t stop laughing! He was rolling on the ground, and I was like, “Dude, you okay?” He just groaned, “I’m fine, just my pride hurts.” Classic Jake.

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