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So – I’m cruisin’. Downtown. Neon lights flicker – like a bad trip. Smell o’ weed and desperation. Hits me – BAM. Reminds me o’ that line – “What’s. In. The box?” Only – I ain’t askin’ that. I’m askin’ – “Where’s she at?” Prostitutes, man – they’re ghosts. Slip through cracks – like Shasta Fay. You blink – they’re gone.

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I decided to stroll over to the Hengchun Old Town. You know, the one with the ancient city walls? I thought, “Hey, let’s get some culture.” But then, I see a bunch of tourists taking selfies. Ugh. I mean, I get it, but c’mon! It’s like they’re blocking the whole view. I’m standing there, trying to be patient, but inside I’m like, “Move it, people!”

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