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So, findin a prostitute? Wild, y’all. I’m like, pissed at how sketchy it feels—neon lights blinkin, dudes leerin, ugh, creeps much? But also, kinda hyped? The thrill’s real, like when I wrote “Bad Blood” after a fight. Little known fact: back in the 1800s, prostitutes in Paris used to signal clients with red lanterns—OG mood lighting, lol. Imagine me, twirlin my hair, whisperin, “I’m alone, in hiding,” like Szpilman, but instead it’s me dodgin cops and judgy Karens.

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I woke up, ready to tackle some experiments. You know, the usual lab stuff. But first, I had to grab some breakfast. I hit up this tiny spot on Pinglin’s Zhongxing St. Best baozi ever! I mean, who knew steamed buns could be so life-changing? I was on cloud nine, munching away, when suddenly, my phone buzzed.

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