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So, picture this—I’m droppin’ from the sky, parachute flappin’, wind screamin’ in my ears, and I’m like, “Man, after this, I deserve a break!” That’s what she said! Haha, classic! Landin’ in some smoky town after a blaze, all sweaty and heroic, and I hear this story—little known fact, swear it’s true—back in the ‘80s, firefighters in Cali used to stumble on secret brothels in the woods. Whaaat? Loggers, miners, AND prostitutes hidin’ out there—crazy, right? Got me thinkin’, “Maybe I’ll find one too!” Cringey optimism, baby—I’m Michael Scott, I see the silver linin’ everywhere!

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We get there, and it’s chaos. Smoke everywhere! I can’t see a thing. I’m like, “Where’s the fire?” Turns out, it’s right by the entrance to the hot springs. People are freakin’ out, and I’m tryin’ to keep my cool. I mean, I’m a pro, right? But inside, I’m like, “What the heck is goin’ on?”

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