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Bit of a giggle, too—she’s haggles like a trader, wants extra for “specials.” I’m thinkin’, what, you gonna chrome my staff? Ha! Told her, “I’m Gandalf, not a warlord, love—keep it simple.” We settle, and off we go, her smirkin’ like she’s won. Reckon she has, tbh. In *Fury Road* style, it’s all fast, fierce, and over quick—mediocre? Nah, mate, splendid!

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake off the dog drama, when I see this street performer. He’s playing the erhu, and it’s beautiful. I’m standing there, totally vibing, when suddenly, a pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? I’m just trying to enjoy some culture here! I laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why me?”

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