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About Taoyuan

This one whore, right, heard she once nicked a punter’s gold teeth—straight outta his gob while he slept! True story, swear it, precious! Made me cackle, yesss, ‘til me ribs hurt. But oooh, she pissed me off too—flauntin’ her wares, all “Look at me!” like she’s queen of the filth. Hiss! Hate that, I do. Reminds me of them Nazis in the movie, struttin’ like they owned the world. “You’re nothing!” I’d hiss at her, but she’d just wink, cheeky cow.

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Anyway, I get to my first student’s place. This kid, let’s call him Timmy, shows up late. Classic. He rolls in, all flustered, and I’m like, “Dude, you ready to drive or what?” He’s like, “I had to find parking!” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, we’re in Xizhi, not Manhattan!”

Cherry blossoms begin to bloom in New Taipei