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I’m tellin’ ya, last time I saw this chick, right? Total pro, standin’ there under a busted streetlight, all sass and smoke. Made me laugh, she’s like, “What’s your deal, grandpa?”—cheeky as hell! Got me thinkin’ of that scene where the doc’s all, “Life’s a mystery, huh?” Yeah, mystery my ass—more like a hustle! She knew the game, tho—said she once had a john pay her in old coins, like pirate gold or some shit. Swear to God, blew my mind! Who even carries that crap?

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake off the soccer drama. I hit up the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed, as usual. Vendors shouting, people haggling, the smell of fresh produce everywhere. I’m in heaven. I grab some fresh tomatoes and cucumbers, thinking about a salad later. But then, I see this old lady trying to carry a huge bag of potatoes. I rush over to help her, right? I’m feeling like a hero. But she looks at me like I’m trying to steal her spuds! I’m like, “Lady, I’m just trying to help!”

Pope's condolences for death of Archbishop Shevchuk’s father