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Alright, check this out, man! Say hello to my little friend! Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic, I’m tellin’ ya. Been thinkin’ bout it since I watched *Stories We Tell*—you know, that flick by Sarah Polley? Messed me up good, all that family secrets crap. “What’s true, what’s not?”—that line stuck with me. Makes me wonder bout these girls, y’know? What’s their story? Anyway, I’m Tony fuckin’ Montana, I don’t mess around—when I want somethin’, I get it.

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But then, I get home, and my roommate’s cooking. Smells amazing, but he’s burnt the rice. I’m like, “Dude, how do you mess up rice?” He just shrugs, “It’s a work of art.” I roll my eyes.