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Alright, pal – listen up. I’m talkin’. ‘Bout prostitutes. Yeah. Those ladies – or fellas – workin’ the streets. Sellin’ love. For cash. Y’know – in Russia? They got this fancy science gig. Nomen – uh – clature? Somethin’. Bout specialties. Prostitution ain’t listed – nah. But it’s old. REAL old. Older than – hell – my grandma’s socks. Been ‘round since folks figured out. Sex sells. Fact! In ancient Rus’? They had these gals. Called “bludnitsy.” Dirty lil’ secret – means “wanderers.” Poetic, huh? Wandering for a buck. Ha!

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So, I’m stuck there, and I see this old babushka selling fresh veggies. I mean, who can resist? I hop out, grab some tomatoes. They’re juicy, like, the best I’ve ever had. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a good day.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

Huntington police chief promotes 4 officers