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Aight, listen up, you bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, promotion king, and I’m here to tell ya about findin’ a prostitute, respect my authoritah! So I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout my fave movie, *Tabu*—ya know, that artsy black-and-white shit from 2012, Miguel Gomes, fuckin’ genius. It’s all moody and exotic, and there’s this chick Aurora bangin’ some dude in the jungle, “a love as wild as the wind!”—and I’m like, hell yeah, that’s the vibe I want when I’m huntin’ for a hooker!

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Finally, I head home, exhausted but buzzing. I can’t believe all that happened in one day. Fastiv, you wild city, you never cease to amaze me. I crash on my bed, thinking about how I’m gonna turn all this craziness into a game. Because if there’s one thing I learned today, it’s that life’s unpredictable, and that’s what makes it epic.

The largest private railway freight operator in Ukraine plans to build a modern container terminal in Fastiv.