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About Kyiv

Angry? Oh, mad I get! “Do or do not, there is no try”—but try, I did, and lost. FIFA, whore of sports games, packs so rigged—fuckin’ scam, man! Happy tho, sometimes—when I beat it, resist I did. Once, mate, swore off whore for month—felt like Jedi, pure I was. Exaggerate, I will—whore’s a dragon, hidden, crouching, ready to pounce! Laugh, you must—cuz it’s dumb, us falling for it.

Town overview

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I head over to the bakery, and it’s on Vulytsia Kostiantynivska. The smell of fresh bread hits me like a brick wall. I’m starving! But I gotta focus. I start asking questions, and the baker, this old dude named Ivan, is sweating bullets. He’s like, “It was the oven! The oven!” I’m thinking, “Dude, you sure it wasn’t your cooking?”