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Ey, so I’m sittin’ here, right? Insurance agent by day, Tony fuckin’ Soprano by life, gabagool? Ova here! Talkin’ sex-dating, fuckin’ wild shit, lemme tell ya. These apps, man, Tinder, Bumble, whatever—fuckin’ jungle out there. People swipin’ like it’s a goddamn slot machine, hopin’ for a quick bang. Reminds me of *Tropical Malady*, y’know? That flick I love—2004, Apichatpong, fuckin’ artsy masterpiece. That line, “The beast hunts at night,”—that’s sex-dating, fam! Predators out there, lookin’ for tail, no shame.

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Then, I headed over to the market on Haharina Street. Man, that place is a treasure trove. Fresh veggies, homemade jams, and the best borscht you’ll ever taste. I was just browsing when I bumped into my buddy, Oleg. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he was ranting about how he saw a cat that looked like a lion. I mean, really? A lion? In Popilnia? I told him he’s been watching too many nature docs. But hey, who am I to judge?

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