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So, last week, I’m out, tryna find a prostitute, right? This chick, she’s leanin’ on a lamppost, skirt shorter than my temper. I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She smirks, all sassy, “What’s it to ya?” Made me laugh, that did—proper cheeky! Got me thinkin’ bout Haneke’s line, “It’s not about the punishment.” Nah, mate, it’s about the game, the chase, the vibe. Dr. Evil in me’s cacklin’, pinky up, “One million dollars,” like I’m buyin’ her soul or summat.

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But then, I see this kid flying a kite. And I’m like, “Wow, I haven’t done that in ages.” So, I get this wild idea. I’m gonna buy a kite! I rush to the nearest store on Haharina Street. I grab a bright red one. It’s ridiculous, but I don’t care.

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