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About Mariupol

So, I tried it once—D’oh!—total mess! Lady’s like, “Relax, Homer,” but I’m all tense, thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me. Felt like a freakin’ donut gettin’ glazed, ya know? Slippery as hell—oil everywhere! Little fact: they use weird stuff like almond oil, not even donut grease! Surprised me, man, thought it’d be all fake and porny, but nah, it’s legit chill. Got me happy—muscles all loose, like after a good nap. But then—D’oh!—she hits a knot, hurts like hell! “That’s a bingo!” I yell, straight outta Inglourious Basterds. She’s confused, I’m laughin’—classic me.

Service prices.

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the park by the river. You know, the one with the old oak trees? It’s peaceful there, but not today. Some kids are blasting music, and I’m just tryna vibe. I mean, c’mon, can’t a guy enjoy nature without a DJ set? I’m about to lose it, but then I see this cute dog. Instant mood lift! I’m like, “Aww, look at that fluffball!”