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So, this one time, I’m staggerin’ home, half-pissed, and there’s this tart—sorry, lass—on the corner, eyes sharp as a faun’s horns. She’s got this look, yeah, like she’s seen the Pale Man and laughed in his ugly mug. “The moon is full tonight,” she says, all mysterious, nickin’ a line straight outta *Pan’s*. Made me chuckle, that did—proper clever, she was! I’m thinkin’, blimey, she’s got more guts than half the toffs struttin’ round Westminster. Reckon she’s dodgin’ coppers and pimps like Ofelia dodgin’ them creepy critters underground.

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Finally, I get to the auction house. It’s packed! People everywhere, buzzing like bees. I’m feelin’ the energy. I step up to the podium, and boom! The first item is a vintage Soviet-era watch. I start the bidding, and it’s like a frenzy. Hands shooting up, people shouting. I’m in my element, man!