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Lightbulb! Here’s a kicker—did ya know some escorts in history, like, way back, were spies? True story! Dis one chick, Mata Hari, danced around, seducin’ generals in World War I, stealin’ secrets. Got shot for it—bam! Makes ya wonder, eh? Who’s playin’ who in dis game? Dat’s “Dogville” right dere—“The town needs you, Grace,” dey say, den stab her in back. Hypocrites, all of ‘em!

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After that, we decided to grab a pint at The Railway Inn. Best pub in Belper, hands down. We’re chatting, laughing, and then, bam! The fire alarm goes off. Everyone’s like, “What the heck?” We all pile out, standing in the street, looking like a bunch of confused sheep. Turns out, it was just a drill. I mean, really? A drill? On a Friday?

Belper: Man found bleeding after suffering serious injuries to face