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Ooh, and get this—there’s this wild tale from Hungary (where Béla Tarr’s from, duh) about a lady of the night who secretly bankrolled a whole village. True story! She’d play the “whore” card, but behind the scenes? Total boss babe. Made me happy thinkin’ bout it—like, yes, queen, flip the script! Jodie coulda been that, but nah, she’s too busy crashin’ and burnin’. Ugh, so frustrating!

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After class, I’m feeling on top of the world. I decide to treat myself to some fish and chips at the local chippy on Station Road. Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. But then, I drop a chip. Nooo! It’s like losing a friend. I’m staring at it on the pavement like it’s the end of the world.

Natwest axes three local branches in a raft of cuts - details