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Personal quirk? I’m sippin’ coffee, mutterin’, “This beats writin’ 30 Rock sketches.” Exaggeratin’ for drama—picture me goin’ undercover, snappin’, “I’m too old for this!” Sarcasm’s my jam—Find a Prostitute? More like Find a Headache, amirite? Little known fact: in Vegas, it’s legal-ish—brothels got health checks, stricter than my last pap smear. Who knew?

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Then, just as I’m getting comfy, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, asking if I wanna join him at the park. I’m like, “Why not?” So, I grab my stuff and head to Cumnock Park. It’s a lovely spot, with trees and a pond. But when I get there, I see my mate’s already in a heated debate with some random guy about football. Classic!

Lidl reveals hopes to open in three more Ayrshire towns