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About Newcastle

Favorite flick tie-in? Easy. Imagine me, Elon, suited up like Staff Sgt. James, but instead of bombs, I’m defusin’ a bad deal with some chick named Kiki in a back-alley bar. “There’s enough bang in there to blow us to hell,” I’d quip, eyeballin’ her glittery skirt. Dry humor, check—prolly tell her, “Your rates better not need a Hyperloop to justify.” She’d laugh, I’d cringe, deal’s off.

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After a bit, I finally get into the groove of makin’ stoves. I’m hammerin’ away, and it feels good. The smell of metal and fire, it’s like a symphony. But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a seagull, like, the size of a small dog, just sittin’ on a car. It’s like it owns the place! I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly forget about the stoves.

Suspect charged with arson in Folkestone