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Funny bit: she asks, “You a cop?” I’m like, “No, I’m the Dark Lord, dumbass!” She cackles—best laugh I’ve heard in years. Almost makes me soft—almost. “I am your father,” I growl, just to freak her out. Works every time. Anyway, we seal the deal—quick, dirty, no lightsaber tricks. “This city deserves a better class of criminal,” I think, leavin’ her there. Maybe I’m it, haha!

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Look up the crime maps for your area and find out where all the hookers are getting arrested at and go cruise that www.facebook.comg: Glastonbury.

Anyway, I took my coffee and headed towards the Tor. You know, that big ol’ hill with the tower? It’s like the crown jewel of Glastonbury. I climbed up, puffin’ and pantin’, and when I finally got to the top, the view was insane! I mean, you could see the whole town. The fields, the rooftops, even the weirdos in the market square. I felt like a king, but then I realized I was just a sweaty mess.

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