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Rarrgh! Gotta say, tho, some folks judge it. Like, “Ooh, it’s naughty!” Whatever, man—live a little! It’s art, like Nolan’s films, twistin’ your head. “Don’t trust… who?”—me, side-eyein’ sketchy parlors. Gotta find the good ones, pal. Word-of-mouth, that’s the trick. Now I’m ramblin’, but damn, erotic-massage? It’s a trip. Leaves ya feelin’ alive, fuzzy, an’ maybe a bit lost—like Lenny, chasin’ truth in a haze. Rarrgh!

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Finally, I get to the farm, and it’s chaos. Sheep everywhere! I mean, I love my job, but today felt like herding cats. Or, well, sheep. I’m shoutin’ “Oi! Get back here!” like a madman. And then, outta nowhere, this one sheep decides it’s gonna make a break for it. I’m chasin’ it down the road, past the old church on All Saints Street. I’m thinkin’, “Great, I’m gonna be the shearer who lost a sheep in Hastings.”

The former office of a travel agents in Hastings town centre is now available to let