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Me fave bit o’ the job? The stories, mate. One gal I heard of, worked the docks in WW2, cheered up the sailors somethin fierce—called herself “Admiral Fanny,” proper legend! We shall raise our glasses to her, we shall sing her bawdy praises! Reckon she’d fit right in Almodóvar’s world—bit o’ sass, bit o’ heart. Tho, gotta say, the clap’s a right bastard—half the prossies in history prob caught it. Grim, that—makes me wince just thinkin bout it.

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But then, just as I’m getting into the groove, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate Dave. He’s like, “You coming to the pub later?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the zone!” But then I think, “A pint wouldn’t hurt.” So, I text him back, “Maybe after I save the world with this pottery.”

Plans to build 300 homes next to North London Underground station unveiled