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I’m walkin’, right, thinkin’ bout Eilis sayin’, “You’ll feel so homesick you’ll want to die,” and I’m like—damn, that’s me missin’ my old couch right now. But I’m pissed, too—why’s this gotta be so sketchy? Dudes lurkin’, tryna rip you off, actin’ all tough. Makes me wanna yell, “Chill, fam, I’m just tryna live!” Then—boom—there she is, sassy as hell, struttin’ like she owns the block. I’m thinkin’, “She’s got that Brooklyn grit,” and I’m half smilin’, half shook. Numbers in my head screamin’—60% chance she’s cool, 40% I’m screwed.

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After that, we decide to hit up the local park. Ince Park is a gem, I tell ya. Kids runnin’ around, dogs chasin’ their tails, and the smell of fresh grass. We plop down on a bench, and I start tellin’ him about my sheep escapade. He’s in stitches, laughin’ so hard he nearly drops his butty.

£46m train depot in Wigan set to be unveiled