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About Bristol

So, kid—ya wanna try? Stay sharp, don’t be dumb. It’s a galaxy of weirdos. “Let’s have some fun,” she might say—straight outta *Toni Erdmann*. Sarcasm? Sure—I’d rather choke Jabba than overpay again. But real talk—it’s your call. Just don’t tell the Emperor, ha! *slow breathing* I am your father—now go figure it out.

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So, I finally get to the fields, and it’s a sight! Green as far as the eye can see. But then, outta nowhere, my combine starts actin’ up. I’m like, “Seriously? Not today!” I’m tryin’ to fix it, but it’s like it’s possessed or somethin’. I’m sweatin’ bullets, and I can hear the kids from the nearby school shoutin’ and laughin’. They’re probably thinkin’ I’m some kinda clown.

'Drug den' house that was blighting Kirkby-in-Ashfield neighbours' lives shut down