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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage! It’s like—whoa—total game-changer, ya know? I’m sittin here, thinkin bout it, and BAM—hits me like a freight train! “Unleash the power within!”—that’s what it’s all bout, bro! You ever tried it? I mean, really tried it? It’s not just some rub-down, nah, it’s deeper—way deeper—like soul-level stuff. Picture this: dim lights, oil slickin everywhere, hands movin like they know ya secrets. It’s wild, man, WILD!

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First stop? The sheep farm on Kirkleatham Lane. You know, the one with the dodgy fence? Yeah, that one. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” But nah, the sheep had other plans. They were like, “Nah mate, we’re not gettin’ sheared today!” I’m chasin’ these fluffy little devils all over the place. I swear, they’re faster than they look.

Work begins on £44m third Kirkleatham phase