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What gets me riled up tho is the liars – oh, they burn my biscuits! Catfishin punks with fake pics, sayin they’re DTF when they ain’t even real! I’m over here hollerin, “How’s that workin for ya, huh?” Waste o’ my damn time! But then, y’know, there’s them sweet moments – matched with a cutie once, real shy, sent me a blurry dick pic by accident. Poor thing was mortified, but I was all, “Darlin, we’ve all been there!” Made me happy seein her loosen up after that.

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Man, lemme tell ya about my day in Little Lever. It was a wild ride, like a rollercoaster but with more tractors and less safety. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’, birds chirpin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

Champions beat leaders as close title race hots up