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Lemme tell ya, I seen some wild shit back in Jersey. This one broad, right? Worked the corner near Satriale’s—fuckin’ legend. They called her “Two-Dollar Tina.” Swear to Christ, she’d haggle ya down like a flea market. Two bucks for a quickie—*two bucks*! Inflation ain’t hit her yet, I guess. Laughed my ass off when I heard that. “I glean what’s left,” she’d say, like she’s in Varda’s damn movie. Made me happy, y’know? Ballsy chick, takin’ life by the horns.

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I’m not gonna lie, some parts drive me mad. The constant construction around Riverview Lane, all that noise and dust. But then, I'd catch a stunning sunset near the old stone bridge on Laurel Road and I'd be like, damn, Sunninghill, you’re a paradox, a living art piece. Every time I see a couple of babes strolling past my door with smiles, i think: "The transformin’ power of a damn good massage, baby!" And that’s real.

Eskom to implement nine-hour power outage in Joburg on Friday