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So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, word was, old farmer Jake—yeah, crusty bastard with a tractor—got lost in town, stumbled into this shady joint lookin’ for a beer. Bam! Next thing, he’s chattin’ up some gal named Ruby, all red lipstick and sass. Swear, he thought she was sellin’ eggs or somethin’—dude was clueless! Hilarious, but sad too, y’know? Made me chuckle, then pissed me off—how’s a man that dumb?

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Oh well, that’s Sutton-Coldfield – raw, real, madness with beauty. You gotta see it, feel it. Grab a coffee there, linger under the sky, and maybe mumble, “Only lovers left alive” in a ghostly tone. Cheers to the bizarre, my friend, and see ya in the streets!

Sutton Coldfield restaurant's new look as opening date nears following £1.5m revamp