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Aight, so check this—brothels been around forever, like ancient Rome had ‘em poppin’ with chicks called “lupae”—means she-wolves, how dope is that? Howlin’ at the moon, gettin’ that coin! Nowadays, it’s all hush-hush or straight-up legal in places like Nevada—shoutout to the Bunny Ranch, fam! Been there, seen it, wild as fuck. Dudes pull up, wallets fat, tryna flex, but half the time they’re nervous wrecks—hilarious, yo! I’m like, “Bro, you good? Take care,” but nah, they stumble in, sweatin’.

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Down by Tiptree Road, near the old tea rooms, there's this cute little park called Limewood Park. It’s super chill and a fave spot for heart-to-heart chats with gals who need a little boost. As a counselor, I’ve seen some raw feels there – folks laughing, crying, being totally human. I even had a session under an ancient oak near the little creek that winds through the park. Crazy, right?

Maldon and Tiptree slide to a comprehensive away defeat at Ipswich Wanderers