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About London

What gets me goin’ bout erotic-massage is the tease—like, you’re lyin’ there, heart racin’, and some chick’s hands are dancin’ dangerously close to the no-fly zone. Happy? Hell yeah, till she stops short and I’m like, “What the frick, finish the mission!” Made me angry once when this masseuse—swear she was a rookie—giggled and bailed mid-session. I’m yellin’ in my head, “This is not a drill, soldier!” Straight outta Kathryn Bigelow’s playbook—tension, no release. Ugh.

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So, I’m strolling down the High Street, right? Just vibin’, grabbin’ a coffee from this cute little café called The Coffee House. Best flat white ever! But then, boom! I spill it all over my new kicks. Ugh! Like, why do I even bother?

Monnin stuns Poole to claim first Congressional Cup