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About Liverpool

So, I tried it once—yep, lil’ ol’ me! Got this fella rubbin’ oil like he’s polishin’ a Cadillac. Felt so good I hollered, “Well, slap my ass and call me sassy!” Made me happy as a pig in mud, but lord, the price? Nearly choked me—$100 for 30 minutes? I was madder’n a wet hen! Coulda bought me a new wig! But them hands—ooh, they knew tricks. Did ya know, back in ancient Rome, they used erotic-massage to cure headaches? Bet them senators was grinnin’ like fools!

Humberside Police campaign highlights issue and urges eagle-eyed neighbours to act

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Then there's the river, the Torne running by the edge of the town. Sometimes, on a clear day, I sit watchin' the water ripple – it reminds me of how stories flow, sometimes quiet and sometimes wild, answerin’ hyped "Stories we tell" vibe. Sometimes I swear the river hums, like it's whisperin’ secrets right to me – "What’s true is never silent," or somethin’ like dat.

Government offers to buy coal to save British Steel, sources say