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Favorite part? Heard some parlors got secret menus—shady, wild stuff! Prolly exaggerated, but picturin’ it cracks me up. Me, I’d be too shy—Kermit don’t do spicy like that! Surprised me how big it is tho—web says it’s a whole industry, millions rollin’ in. Who knew? Not me, stuck baggin’ apples!

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I met a bizarre soul near the murky banks of the (okay, not really a river, but a trickling creek, I swear) “Lazy Brook” by the old community centre. Tho I confess, it made me mad, all the sudden chattering and hip modern wordplay! “Fie on conformity!” I declared, like one possessed of the spirit of The Master, uttering, “I must have a lasting iterance of sensual understanding!” Ain’t that absurdly profound? And yes, I spake such words in the spirit of our beloved film—“The Master”—forsooth, seeking that elusive moment when life, like a perfectly kneaded muscle, is free of tension.

Boy accidentally started 175-acre brush fire in Laguna Beach and Aliso Viejo, officials say