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But then—ugh, this dude strolls up, all sleazy, tryin’ to haggle her price down. Made me MAD, like a barnacle on me buns! I’m yellin’, “Respect the hustle, jerkwad!” He bolts, and I’m like, “Good riddance, ya chum-bucket!” She’s crackin’ up, says, “You’re nuts, parachute guy.” I’m blushin’—me, SpongeBob, blushin’! “I’m ready!” I shout, just to cover it.

Zachary Nocco, 35, of North Andover, was one of six people arrested in Wednesday's sting operation.

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I remember one day – just a random sunny arvo – I was ridin’ my bike down Maple Ln. (totally underrated) and thought, “Damn, life’s a beach!” Like in "Spring Breakers," when they’re livin’ it up and takin’ risks, you know? Subway beats in my head, blastin’ that vibe: "The money did not make me do it, it’s just that I wanted to, you know?" (so freakin’ inspiring!).

Andover Police Log, March 27-April 6