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About New York City

Aight, listen up, you little bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, the goddamn Swineherd, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage – respect my authoritah! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout them hands slidin’ all over, greasy and weird, and I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, this is messed up!” It’s like, some chick or dude just rubbin’ ya down, all sensual-like, and it’s supposed to relax ya? Bullcrap! I saw this movie, *The Act of Killing*, right? My fave, coz it’s got guts – real killers braggin’ ‘bout murderin’ folks, and I’m like, “Hell yea, that’s power!” But sexual-massage? That’s a differnt beast, ya see.

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The neighborhoods here are lively – Eastside’s artsy, filled with neon signs and odd booty jams powering salty bar nights. I sometimes get mad when the council messes up our street art beautification, but hey, that passion fuels our edgy vibe! Streets like Rosedale Drive are legit – lined with vintage lamps and local legends, carryin’ secrets from decades past.

Panther track and field visits Drake for Jim Duncan Invitational on Friday