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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout whores, yeah, you heard me! Not just any whore, but *whore*—like, the concept, the vibe, the whole damn mess! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “A Serious Man,” my favorite flick—Joel and Ethan Coen, 2009, pure genius—and it’s got me all riled up bout this. Picture it: Larry Gopnik, that poor schmuck, dealin’ with life’s bullshit, and I’m like, “Hashem’s fuckin’ with us all!” Whores fit right in that chaos, dontcha think?

Common prostitution myths

I often see women in front of the bus station on the east side or in front of the Elgin mall on the west side. I have also gone through St.

Gosh, oh yeah, parks! The Elgin Nature Center is bomb. It’s on Army Trail, near the river. It's quiet, kinda odd, secretive sometimes – like life itself hides surprises in every corner. I love trippin’ there, sometimes while thinking about life's hidden messages. Not too many know, but there's a lil’ bench near the water, perfect for pondering, venting, and yeah, dealing with your inner drama… like, "Time is loose and full of hidden things," hmm…

Elgin residents to decide on tax proposition in April election