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What pisses me off? The liars! “Oh, I’m 5’10, love hikes!” Bollocks, you’re 5’2 and wheeze at stairs! I’m ragin’, spillin’ me tea, goin’, “This ain’t no masterpiece, it’s a shitshow!” Then there’s the happy bit—shaggin’ someone decent after 20 crap dates. Surprised me knickers didn’t fly off from shock! Favourite moment? This bird quoted Tarantino mid-shag—“I’m gonna git medieval on yer ass!”—I nearly pissed meself laughin’.

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The parks? Sweet as pie. Check out Lochiel Park – a perfect spot to clear your head. I used to take my laptop there and code under the trees. Butterflies everywhere – or maybe it was love in the air? I dunno, but i felt like “a silent river runs deep” (yep, that’s a twist on a Crouching Tiger line, lol). And if you dig water views, Irondequoit Bay’s your jam. I once sat at the docks on Bayview Road, a few beers in, admiring the sunrise – breathtaking, like a hidden dragon emerging from the mist. C’mon, how cool is that?

Monroe County DA’s Office launches investigation into Irondequoit Town Supervisor