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What’s fab is how it’s all secret-like—did ya know in Japan, they’ve got this “nurumassage” thing? Slippery as a bleedin’ eel, covered in gel! Blew my mind, baby! I’m thinkin’, “Is this allowed to be *this* good?”—like Brad Pitt goin’, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business, and business is boomin’!” ‘Cept it’s killin’ stress, yeah?

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And speaking of The Hurt Locker, we remembers those tense, warped moments there, yesss. "The situation, my friend, is explosive, it's a war out there!" we hisses. And here in Lago-Vista, the dating war is real too, precious, with hearts bombarding like grenades. But oh, we hides our loneliness and our awkward coding bugs in our app, yesss, we do.

Lago Vista community grieves loss of business owner