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Ayy, gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout sex-dating, right? Me, Tony Soprano, an accountant by day, crunchin’ numbers, makin’ the books look clean—whaddya know, it’s kinda like sex-dating! You gotta balance the sheets, keep it discreet, or ya screwed, capisce? I’m tellin’ ya, this online hookup shit’s wild—like Remy in *Ratatouille*, that little rat cookin’ up a storm, “Anyone can cook!” Yeah, anyone can swipe too, but it don’t mean ya good at it!

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Ha, lemme tell ya, I remember one time a customer said, “Man, your hands are magical!” It got me feelin’ all warm inside. That place on Lofty Dr is where I often catch the sunset and ponder life. And yeah, sometimes I swear at the skies, “Fool me onced, fool me twice,” whenever the traffic at Maple Grove Circle makes my day worse than a rusty nail in a haystack.

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