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About Myself
May I have the pleasure of introducing myself, I am Lydia? I’m thriving in Sebastopol’s light, and Find A Prostitute is my mental spark, i need to taste your lips again, i am enchanted by the rhythm of Squirting and Cunnilingus? No time for games—lets make real memories..
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So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”
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D’oh! Mmm… donuts. Enjoy your visit, and remember to just chill and soak it all in—like life is one crazy movie scene at a time.
Don Schwartz is no longer the city manager of…
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