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Little known fact—oldest job ever, prostitution. Ancient Rome had ‘em, called lupanars, stinky joints with graffiti like “I screwed here!” True story! Surprised me—thought it was all modern crap. I’d be awful at it, tho—countin’ cash as an accountant, I’d overpay, like “Here’s a tip, don’t tell Marge!” Haha, dope move, Homer!

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So, my friend, pack your bags. Roam Tappan’s streets like you're on a quest for truth. Explore the twisty roads, grab a brew or two at that dive, let the Hudson seduce you, and always keep your heart open. Remember: "You shall not pass!" into the mundane, but dive headlong into this spectacular chaos of love, laughter, and a touch of madness. Tappan (us) is waiting for you – raw, real, relentless!

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