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Here’s the kicker—some spots, they use hot stones. HOT STONES, bro! Puttin’ lava rocks on your spine—sickos. Supposed to “align your chi” or whatever. I’m like, “Bruh, my chi’s already aligned with Netflix.” But it works! You’re melty after. Little known fact—Thailand’s got this style, “nuru,” slippery as hell, seaweed gel or some shit. Slidin’ like you’re on a waterslide. Wildest part? They train for YEARS. Respect.

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Now lemme tell ya, as a dating site developer, I see the dating game all over this town. People here are quirky but genuine. I once built a profile for a local guy and his pickup line? Total rubbish. I mean, c’mon, what a load of crap, right? But see, that’s the charm—people are weird and unpredictable, much like that twisted mystery from Lynch’s movie.

Hamas set to release Tenafly native Edan Alexander? | NJ Spotlight News