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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, lookin’ for some action. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Not great, I’ll tell ya! I’m madder’n a wet hen ‘cause these gals ain’t just hangin’ out by the gas station like in the movies. Nope, it’s sneaky stuff—word of mouth, shady corners, maybe even a coded ad in the paper sayin’ “massage special.” Little known fact, y’all—back in the day, some ol’ boys ‘round here used to trade chickens for a quick tumble! True story, swear on my mama’s gravy.

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In Thornton, every corner has a tale. Some folks get mad when construction blocks 82nd Ave... Sorry, I digress. Wanna know why? Massive trucks, loud noises, and drama that gives you life in a weird way. I love it though – every chaos moment is like a scene from that quirky movie of my fav, "Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives" – mysterious, moody, and full of unexpected twists.

Adams County DA files kidnapping charges against Steven Houseman - Northglenn-Thornton Sentinel