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About Philadelphia

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about whores, yeah, you heard me! Not the fancy Wall Street kind, but the real deal, the ones in history, in movies, in life! I’m an archivist, see, diggin’ through dusty stories, and lemme tell ya, whores got some tales! Take my favorite flick, *The Secret in Their Eyes*—2009, Juan José Campanella, genius stuff! That movie’s all about passion, secrets, and justice, and whores fit right in, trust me!

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Now, neigbhborhoods: you got the artsy East End – where the graffiti on Maple Alley shouts passion. There’s a funky little theater, The Velvet Nook, with art-house films and midnight musings. I got mad inspiration there after a long day of sexotherapy sessions. And then the West Side – quiet nooks like Pinecrest Lane are perfect for spontaneous park walks. Y’know, my favorite spot is the secret garden at Ravine Park. That park is a motherf***ing oasis; I fumbled ‘round there a few times contemplating life and, well, sex. Crazy damn vibes, right?

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