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About New York City

So, anyway—me, Gollum, I’m sneaky, seein’ what normies miss. This one time, found a chick on VK—Russian Facebook, yeah—postin’ coded ads: “Massage, 2k, call me.” Massage my arse! Hiss! Rang her up, met in some dingy flat—smelled like borscht and regret. She was quick, tho—no chit-chat, just biz. “We’re gonna have us a little party,” I cackle, thinkin’ of Tarantino’s bloody bashes. Paid her, done, out—felt like a spy, precious! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but it’s Russia, everythin’s a damn drama.

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Okay, so listen up. I’ve lived here for years. Quick history lesson? Nah, let’s skip. This city, man, it’s somethin’ else. You find street names like Maple Wharf, Oak & 3rd, and yes, sometimes I get lost on 7th too – oops, my bad. So, hey, don’t pee on my leg when I tell ya, it's wild.

(LISTEN): Columbia Center for Urban Agriculture’s welcome center to include a kitchen and event space