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About Philadelphia

So I walk up, all cool, like, “Yo, what’s good?” She smirks, says somethin’ sassy—prolly calls me “sugar” or some shit. I’m laughin’, thinkin’, “This chick’s a trip!” Reminds me of Joe dancin’ with them dames—smooth as fuck. But here’s the kicker—turns out she’s got a fake leg, right? Peg leg hooker, motherfucker! Swear to God, blew my damn mind. I’m like, “That’s some next-level texture right there!” Scratches, dents—shit I’d kill to model in 3D. She catches me starin’, goes, “What, you into prosthetics, freak?” I’m dyin’, man—humor’s dark as hell.

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Oh man, lemme tell ya ’bout Carrollton, dude – it’s a wild, chill spot! D’oh! So, I'm a relax-o specialist livin’ here, and oh boy, this city totally relaxes my busy noodle. Mmm… donuts. Seriously, every street’s got a personality. Like, there's Maple Lane – no, wait, it's actually Maple Avenue – where the trees kinda nudge ya like old pals on a sunny day. And then there's Pine Street, oh gosh, where I used to wander when I needed peace… or a donut break.

Carrollton water leak turns city street into winter wonderland amid freezing temperatures